


Happy Holmium

by angelofthequeers



Series: ML oneshots [5]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Chemistry jokes, Don't copy to another site, Dorks in Love, F/M, Fluff, Identity Reveal, ML Secret Santa, Miraculous Ladybug Love Square, Romance, Secret Santa, it's literally just sugar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-16
Updated: 2019-12-16
Packaged: 2021-02-26 21:07:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,723
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21825295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelofthequeers/pseuds/angelofthequeers
Summary: “I thought that since this is your last Christmas with me before you all go to lycée, we could do something a little fun,” Ms Bustier says. “A Secret Santa!”What's Marinette to do when she draws Adrien's name for the class' Secret Santa? Turn into a disaster, of course, until a little Happy Holmium spirit gives away more than intended.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Series: ML oneshots [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1361839
Comments: 71
Kudos: 557





	Happy Holmium

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don’t own ML.
> 
> My Secret Santa gift for [wedontdeservenino](https://wedontdeservenino.tumblr.com) on Tumblr!

“Happy Holmium, Marinette!”

The mere sight of Adrien doesn’t make Marinette want to die now after months of shifting her focus to being his friend over asking him out, but he can’t just look over his shoulder and wave like that and expect her to be _okay_ with –

Wait. What?

“Happy _what_?” Marinette says.

“Don’t encourage him,” Nino groans. “He’s so proud of it, like he thinks he deserves a freaking award for it.”

“Happy Holmium!” Adrien grins like the cat that got the cream. “Get it? Ho? For holmium? Ho, ho, ho? I could go with Merry Chromium if you prefer!” he adds when Marinette and Alya join Nino in groaning and thumping their heads on the desk.

“I can’t believe I want to marry you,” Marinette mumbles into the desktop.

“Huh?” Adrien says. Marinette lets out a small shriek and whips her head up.

“ _Nothing_!” she cries, waving her hands around and praying to whoever might be listening that her face isn’t turning as scarlet as her alter-ego’s suit.

“Smooth,” Alya snickers, also lifting her head.

“Attention, class!” Ms Bustier calls. “I know it's the final class of the day and your attention may be drifting elsewhere, but I'd like it if you could at least listen to this. Then you can go back to pretending to listen while I pretend to believe you.”

Snickers are heard all around the room, especially when Ms Bustier looks at Kim and Nathaniel. Nathaniel laughs sheepishly, while Kim just gives an impish grin and crosses his arms.

“I thought that since this is your last Christmas with me before you all go to lycée, we could do something a little fun,” Ms Bustier says. “A Secret Santa!”

Excited murmuring breaks out across the room. Except for Adrien, who raises his hand and says, “Um, what’s a Secret Santa?”

“Oh, you poor, sheltered boy,” Chloé drawls, and Sabrina snickers. It’s really been quite astonishing to watch Chloé’s slow, heel-dragging progress from a horrific jerk into a jerk with a heart of gold since being given a second chance with the Bee Miraculous. Marinette suspects that it’s mostly to do with Pollen’s influence pushing her to be a better person outside the mask as well as behind it, but if a kwami’s guidance means continued respite from Chloé’s bullying, Marinette’s not exactly going to complain.

“Now, now, Chloé,” Ms Bustier chides. “Adrien, a Secret Santa is where you draw a random name and must give a gift to that person. I’m giving you all until the last day of term to finalise your gifts, in case anyone wants to get creative, but you _must_ participate. I thought it would be a nice reminder of the bonds you’ve all forged before you leave for lycée.”

“Can we give gifts to people other than our Secret Santa?” Lila pipes up. “Even if I don’t get Adrien, I still have the perfect gift for him. I’m sure you’ll _love_ it, Adrien!”

“Aww!” Rose coos. “That’s so thoughtful of you, Lila!”

Marinette meets Adrien’s gaze and rolls her eyes. Her cheeks grow warm when he immediately hides his mouth behind his hand, no doubt concealing the grin he can’t hold back. Meanwhile, Alya mutters something that sounds vaguely like, “Can’t believe I ever fell for her bull.”

“Of course you can, Lila,” Ms Bustier says. “But your focus _must_ be on the recipient that you draw, otherwise it wouldn’t be fair to them.”

“Oh, of _course_!” Lila says. “I promise!”

“Right.” Ms Bustier picks up the small box on her desk and shakes it. The sound of rustling fills the air. “When I call on you, come and draw a name from the box. And no re-drawing! That’s not in the spirit of Christmas. Chloé, you first.”

It’s impossible to tell who Chloé had gotten, since she gives no visible reaction, so Marinette can only conclude that she hadn’t gotten Lila or Adrien, since she’d be utterly disgusted or utterly delighted respectively. Next up is Sabrina, then Adrien, and Marinette’s stomach jolts because what if Adrien draws _her_ name? What kind of present would he get her? Oh, she’d _die_ if she got a gift from _Adrien_ –

“Marinette!” Ms Bustier says loudly. Marinette jumps and squeaks and stumbles to the front of the class, ignoring the way Alya’s very pointed look is scorching the back of her neck. She dips her hand into the box, rummages for a second, pulls out a neatly-folded piece of paper, and unfolds it to reveal… _Adrien Agreste_.

No. Way. She gets to be _Adrien’s_ Secret Santa! Oh, this is perfect! She’ll give him the perfect gift, and he’ll declare his undying love for her, and they’ll run away to an island and get married and have three kids and a hamster –

“Is there a problem, Marinette?” Ms Bustier says.

“N-No! Sorry!” Marinette babbles and rushes back to her seat. Why is she getting so carried away? She hasn’t been like this around Adrien for ages!

“Nice!” Alya hisses with a wide grin when she returns from picking her name and they show each other who they’d drawn. Alya had gotten Rose, which should be easy enough, considering that Rose likes anything pink and flowery and nice-smelling. “What are you gonna get him?”

“I don’t know!” Marinette says. “And after that Christmas disaster last year, I don’t wanna mess this up!”

Alya pats her on the back. “You’ll think of something, girl. You always do.”

Finding the perfect gift for Adrien is all Marinette can think about for the whole afternoon, to the point where Alya eventually shakes her head in disgust and gives up on trying to engage Marinette in conversation at all. It’s not until she’s home and scribbling ideas down in one of her notebooks that she finally speaks for the first time since learning that Adrien is her recipient.

“Rubbish! Rubbish, rubbish, rubbish!” She tears the page out of her notebook and scrunches it up, then throws it across the room. “None of this is good enough for him!”

“You’re overthinking things, Marinette,” Tikki says. “Your gift doesn’t have to be perfect. It just has to have love poured into it. Like the scarf you made for him!”

“Yeah and look how well _that_ turned out.” Marinette drops her notebook and buries her face in her hands with a groan.

“It did turn out well,” Tikki says patiently. Well, if one happens to be a god of however many thousands of years, patience is probably a necessity for one’s mental survival. “Adrien loved it because it was handmade and full of love. The only reason he didn’t know it was from you was because your signature somehow got lost. But this time, you’re giving the gift to him in person, so he’ll know it’s from you!”

“True. True. Okay…” Marinette takes a deep breath and looks back down at her notebook. “I can do this. I can – no, I can’t! I’m gonna screw this up and he’ll never want to be my friend again!”

“Would you be freaking out like this if it was anyone else?” Tikki says.

“No!” Marinette says. “But Adrien is…how many good gifts does he get, Tikki? Remember last year? His father only let us go to his house after he ran away. I have to make this gift perfect for him!”

“Marinette!” Tikki rests her tiny hands on Marinette’s cheeks. “Adrien would be happy if you gave him a _sock_ , so long as there was love put into it! Maybe you should take a break from this.”

“But I can’t! I have –”

“– three weeks to design and create your gift. One night won’t be disastrous. If you take a step back and clear your head, you can come back with fresh eyes and maybe think of something extraordinary!”

Marinette takes a deep breath and pinches the bridge of her nose. “Right. You’re right. It’s just like artist’s block when I’m designing. Tikki, if we headed for patrol a little earlier, would you mind –?”

“Not at all, Marinette! Ready when you are!”

“Tikki, spots on!”

Although it’s not snowing, the Parisian night air is freezing enough to bite as Ladybug leaps and hops across the rooftops towards the Eiffel Tower. By the time she arrives and swings up to the top, her face is chilly and stinging and her breath billows out in front of her as though she’s a ladybug-scaled dragon.

“Well, look what the cat dragged in,” Chat Noir grins from his perch on the edge of the Tower’s tip. Ladybug just rolls her eyes and plops down next to him, ignoring the heat radiating from his damn cat body because there’s no way she’s going to give him the satisfaction of cuddling up to him for warmth.

“Ha, ha,” Ladybug drawls.

“Don’t you mean Happy Holmium?” Chat Noir says, and Ladybug freezes. “Get it? Holmium?”

“Ho, ho,” she breathes as Ladybug.exe starts to crash. Chat Noir beams – no, it’s _Adrien_ , it’s _Adrien_ behind that mask, how did she never see it before…but what are the chances of Adrien being Chat? Then again, what are the chances that both are spouting the exact same joke?

And it’s not like they don’t look similar. Blond hair, green eyes…she’d just always assumed that they were green because of the Miraculous, like hers had been as Lady Noire, but if they’re naturally green…

“Milady?” Chat Noir says. Ladybug jumps and squeaks.

“Fine! I’m fine!” she babbles. “I guess all I want for Christmas is yttrium, oxygen, and uranium!”

 _Oh my god. Did I really just say that to_ Adrien _?_

Chat Noir blinks and frowns, then snorts and slaps a hand over his mouth to muffle his laughter. “Why, bugaboo, if you wanted me for Christmas, all you had to do was ask,” he says. “We have real chemistree, don’t you think?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” Ladybug says. It’s Chat Noir. Adrien, yes, but it’s Chat Noir, her dorky partner. And besides, she hasn’t been a disaster around Adrien for a while now, so she’s not going to slide right back into turning into one in his presence, thank you very much. Or his _presents_ , as he would say. “You’ll have to try harder than that to make me helium.”

“He, he. Really?” Chat Noir raises an eyebrow. “Gotta step up your game.”

Ladybug sniffs and tosses her hair. “Na. Don’t be sodium salty.”

“But milady, you make my heart undergo an exothermic reaction!” Chat Noir clasps at his heart and leans against Ladybug, who pushes him away out of sheer habit rather than because she wants to. Since he’s super warm. That’s it.

“Your heart is nothing but nitrogen, oxygen, and iridium,” Ladybug says. Chat Noir pouts.

“Don’t we have patrol, milady?” he says.

“Oh, so you can start it, but you can’t take the reaction?” Ladybug smirks, climbing to her feet. She helps Chat Noir up, winks, and says, “Well, at least I’m well-prepared for the Chemistry test on Friday.”

“If you ever need my tutoring services in future, all you have to do is ask,” Chat Noir says with his usual roguish grin. Hmm. Nice recovery.

“I’ll be sure to pass that on to the five-year-olds,” Ladybug says and reaches out to flick his bell. Then she’s off, swinging away from the Eiffel Tower before Chat Noir can recover his wits, trying not to think about the fact that she’d just _done that to Adrien_ because if she lets her brain think about that little fact, she’ll splat on the streets below.

But hey, at least now she knows _exactly_ what gift to give to Adrien for the Secret Santa!

* * *

“Alright, class!” Ms Bustier claps her hands, and everyone quiets down and turns to face the front. “I hope you’ve all got your gifts prepared, because today is Secret Santa day!”

Adrien’s classmates start to cheer, but Adrien’s too busy bouncing in his seat with anticipation to find out who his Secret Santa is. Is it Nino? Or Marinette? Or, heck, even Chloé? Just so long as it’s not Lila. Thank god she hadn’t been his Secret Santa recipient because after all the crap she’s pulled, no way could he make himself put good effort into getting her a gift.

“When I draw out your name, come to the front of the class,” Ms Bustier says, shaking her little box of names from when their recipients had been announced. “Then your Secret Santa will step forward and give their gift.” She reaches into the box, pulls out a slip of paper, unfolds it, and says, “Kim!”

“Aw, yeah!” Kim bursts out of his seat and skids to a halt next to Ms Bustier, who looks like she’s trying her best to be Teacherly Strict and not laugh at his antics. “C’mon, who got me?”

“Thankfully, not me!” Alix calls, and the class snickers at her quip. Kim beams and flips her off.

“I’m going to pretend I didn’t see that,” Ms Bustier says. “Who was Kim’s Secret Santa?”

After a moment, there’s the sound of someone sliding out of their seat from the back of the class. Adrien tries his very hardest not to slump in relief when he turns and sees that it’s Lila making her way to the front of the class with a neatly-wrapped red present. He tries. But he’s not sure how successful he is, especially at the plastic quality of her smile when she passes him.

“ _Buon Natale_ , Kim!” Lila chirps, handing over her gift. Kim whoops and tears the paper off to reveal a shoebox. “I’m so sorry, I would’ve loved to get you an autograph from –”

“Are you kidding?” Kim crows as he yanks the lid off the box. “New sneakers! Thanks, Lila, you’re the best!”

Adrien bites down on his lip to smother his laughter when Kim pulls Lila in for what looks like a super tight one-armed hug and she’s forced to smile brightly and grit out something about it being no trouble at all. Soon enough, Kim and Lila are returning to their seats, and Adrien carefully doesn’t look at Lila so that he doesn’t lose the battle against his laughter.

“Time for our next recipient!” Ms Bustier pulls out another name. “Nathaniel!”

Nathaniel’s Secret Santa turns out to be Juleka, who gifts him a small framed painting in dark colours. Although her artistry isn’t the best, Nathaniel’s bouncing on the spot as he throws his arms around Juleka, and Adrien can’t help but smile at the sight. Both Nathaniel and Juleka understand what it means to be creative from the heart, after all, even if their mediums differ.

Nino’s up next, and his gift from Max is a track of songs that Markov had helped Max create “based on the statistics of your music preferences”. Mylène’s gift from Rose is a pretty, handmade yellow rose pin (“because yellow roses mean friendship!”), and she beams and immediately clips it to her sweater next to her Ladybug pin. Then it’s Marinette’s turn to receive her Secret Santa gift from Ivan, which turns out to be a little black cat plushie with bright green eyes, green paw pads, and a bell attached to its neck.

“I know you like Chat Noir,” Ivan mumbles, scratching the back of his head. “So, I thought…well, I’ve got a friend who makes plushies, and she agreed to make that one for you…”

“It’s perfect!” Marinette stands on her tiptoes to kiss Ivan on the cheek. “Thank you so much, Ivan! I can’t believe it’s handmade!”

Marinette…likes Chat Noir? Enough to receive a handmade plushie based on him? Well, obviously, considering the whole Weredad incident, but…Adrien wasn’t aware that she still felt so strongly about him. He swallows and looks away, otherwise the pure joy on Marinette’s face will do leave him with some very unwelcome thoughts, considering that he’s supposed to be in love with Ladybug.

Wait. Supposed to be? He _is_ in love with Ladybug!

“Adrien!” Ms Bustier says.

“Present!” Adrien blurts out. Everyone else snickers.

“Yes, Adrien, come and receive your present,” says a clearly-amused Ms Bustier. Adrien undertakes the walk of shame with warm cheeks, but the spring is back in his step in no time because now he gets to find out who his Secret Santa is! And what they’re going to give him! Every gift except for Lila’s has been handmade so far, and his gift for Chloé is a friendship bracelet in the colours of Queen Bee, so he can only imagine what his gift will be! “Okay, who was Adrien’s Secret Santa?”

Adrien’s eyes, attuned to the slightest of movements, jump to the dark-haired girl slipping out of her seat with a lumpy red package in her hands. Marinette! His Secret Santa is Marinette! How did he get so lucky? She’s so sweet and talented and amazing, so any gift from her is going to have love poured into it to the seams!

“Happy Christmas, Adrien,” Marinette says with pink cheeks as she hands over her gift, which is soft and squishy. Adrien tries not to look _too_ eager as he runs his finger along the tape and tears the paper off to reveal…a red jacket with black spots? A _Ladybug_ jacket?

“How did you know I liked Ladybug?” Adrien blurts out. Marinette’s pink cheeks darken to crimson.

“Just a lucky guess!” she says. “There’s more if you unfold it!”

There’s a card nestled in the jacket, so Adrien carefully sets it on Ms Bustier’s desk and then unfolds the jacket, and his breath catches in his throat. On the back, in black lettering, is stitched _Happy Holmium!_ with a sprig of holly berries, except that the red berries have black ladybug spots and little black cat paws have been embroidered through the green holly leaves.

“Seriously?” Nino groans when Adrien holds the jacket up. “You’re encouraging that joke?”

“It wasn’t _bad_ ,” Marinette argues.

“Finally, someone who appreciates my dashing wit!” Adrien says. He shrugs off his black designer jacket and slips on Marinette’s jacket as fast as he physically can, running his hands over the fleecy material with an undoubtedly goofy grin on his face. “You made me a _jacket_!”

“Yeah!” Marinette nods rapidly. “Um…you should probably read your card.”

Inside the envelope Adrien had set on Ms Bustier’s desk is a Christmas card with a photo of Ladybug on the front, no doubt from Alya’s extensive stash. But it’s what’s inside the card that makes Adrien’s breath catch in his throat:

_Dear Adrien,_

_Happy Holmium! You’re one of my dearest friends and I’m so lucky to have you in my life, especially since I’d say we have real chemistree. You make my heart undergo an exothermic reaction and all I want for Christmas is yttrium, oxygen, and uranium, even if your heart is nitrogen, oxygen, and iridium. At least I’m not sodium salty over puns. You’ll have to try harder to make me helium next time._

_Love,_

_Marinette_

Exothermic reaction? Chemistree? Y-O-U and N-O-Ir? Sodium salty and helium? But… _how_? There’s only one person who knows that all those specific jokes had passed between him and… _Ladybug_.

“No way,” he breathes. Her cheeks now dark scarlet, Marinette looks down at the ground, twisting the toe of her boot against the wooden floor. Dark pigtails, bright blue eyes…kind, sweet, warm, _amazing_ …she’s been in front of him the whole time! “You – I don’t –”

“Can we hurry this up?” Alix complains. “Some of us have gifts to get, y’know! And give,” she hastily adds when Ms Bustier looks at her.

Adrien reaches out, almost in a daze, and runs his fingers along Marinette’s cheek and down to her chin, giving her just enough of a nudge to raise her head. Those bluebell eyes punch him in the gut, leaving him breathless and unable to breathe, and before he knows what he’s doing, he’s cupping her face and leaning in and the class is audibly holding their breaths.

“Milady?” he murmurs against her mouth, so quiet that only the two of them can hear. Marinette gives him a soft little smile and at that moment, Adrien wonders how the hell he’s never realised that she’s Ladybug, because she’s just as _radiant_.

“You should be careful who you joke with, kitty,” Marinette replies. “Hearing the same joke again is old.”

Adrien huffs out a laugh, which Marinette mirrors, her eyes crinkling and lighting up as she laughs too. His eyes dart to her lips, a movement that doesn’t go unnoticed as she also chances a peek at his mouth. But just as Adrien’s leaning in –

“Excuse me, Ms Bustier, but Alix is right!” Lila’s sickly-sweet voice rings clear in the classroom, and Adrien jumps away from Marinette and scratches the back of his head with a little laugh. “We really should get through the rest of the Secret Santas!”

“Aww, come on, Lila!” Rose says. “We’ve been waiting so long for this to happen!”

“It’s okay,” Adrien says. He reaches out to take Marinette’s hand, and she flushes as red as her alter-ego’s suit and looks away while biting her lip. “We can finish this later. Right, princess?”

“Aww!” all the girls coo, apart from Lila.

“Y-Yeah,” Marinette stammers. “Sorry, we’re just holding the whole class up.”

“Don’t apologise,” Ms Bustier says with a wide grin and another name in her hand. “It’s wonderful to see such love at Christmas! Rose, you’re up next! Although I doubt anyone can outdo Adrien and Marinette here.”

Christmas card and original jacket in hand, Adrien heads back to his seat with Marinette behind him, squeezing past Rose on her way to the front. As Rose squeals over the miniature notebook of pressed flowers from Alya, Adrien turns in his seat and catches Marinette’s eye, winking when she finally looks at him. She blushes and looks down, and although Adrien wishes he could pull out the old Chat Noir charm and delight in the fact that his lady really does love him back, they can do that later. After all, they’ve got all the time in the world now.

“Happy Holmium, Adrien!” Marinette says with a little giggle that lights up his world. Adrien beams back.

“Happy Holmium, Marinette,” he says.


End file.
